Lack of Control

I think we all want some sort of control over our own life.... and for some that means a degree of control in our homes and in our work place. Half the time I feel like I lack control in anything... with my son... I can try to 'make' him do things... or act a certain way... but the fact is... he has his own mind. He wants independence and he is going to push his limits with me. I have to admit that there are times when I 'give up'... I just don't want a battle, (not wise.)
This reaction is true in other areas of my life as well. When it comes to discussing things with my husband... there are times where I 'let it go'. In some ways... I really trust that he knows best. Then there are times where, again, I just don't want a battle, (not wise.)
When it comes to any place that I have worked... I can be a bit of an over achiever. I work hard. I push myself until I am on the verge of a burn out, (not wise.) I have always felt like the work place was a place that I had to prove myself. I have always had a hard time saying no. In most jobs I have worked myself up to high positions to have that control. The thing is... I am not just trying to prove myself to others... I am trying to prove myself to me... "I can do it!", "I am valuable"... Even in this place in my life... I have little control. There is always something to knock be back on my bottom.

The fact is, I can push and fight all I want for control and there may be times where I feel I have it, but I don't. I know in my heart that God is the one in control. I am actually very thankful for that... He knows better then I.